It hit me like a ton of bricks this morning. A small obstacle in the way of me receiving financial wealth was removed! A light bulb went off out of nowhere and I almost cried upon the realization. I realized that I had, low key, still NOT given myself PERMISSION to want nice things and want to be very wealthy.

Yes, I wanted these things; I had a burning desire for these things. What I found myself doing was light weight scoffing at actual [financially] well off people though. How can I truly have/want something that I side eye action to the people that have it? Some people that I saw as show offs, (because some are just “stuntin” and aren’t really wealthy at all but), I realized that maybe they weren’t being show offs. Maybe they are just living their lives and really enjoy their lives and what they have. Why shouldn’t they be allowed to share that with others if they want to? They shouldn’t feel bad because they may have what I was perceiving as “more” or “nicer” that what I have. I see now that many of them are sharing because they are so thankful for it all.

So many of us want the wealth but there’s a lot of underlying judgement and sometimes guilt or shame in wanting it in the first place because most of us are taught not to be “greedy” and that we are to “just be happy with what we have”

I felt a spiritual flood gate open when this realization hit me over the head. I wasn’t allowing myself to attract wealth and an absolute abundance of money partly because I was judging wealthy people. Yes, I was and it was blocking/slowing me from attracting wealth more easily. In my head, I was telling them how they should appreciate their wealth by being more modest and not being so “showy”. “I mean, do they have to put EVERYTHING on Instagram and Facebook?” First of all, Milan, it’s their damn Instagram or Facebook account, they can do and share whatever the hell they want on THEIR account. No one is making you follow them. If you don’t like it, SCRAM! Unfollow them if it bothers you so much how “showy” they are. Yes, this is how I talk to myself, I keeps it real. Like I said in the previous paragraph, they more than likely aren’t showing off and are just simply sharing and showing their gratitude for it all. It’s just my lenses were perceiving things a certain way because of how I felt about myself, where I was in my life/career and my deserving of wealth. When good things happen to people they don’t normally celebrate it in a corner, most often they share it with others! Duh, Milan. Be happy for them! Because you’re going to have wealth in your life how it resonates with you and share it too.

-it’s OK in the midst of my absolute appreciation to WANT MORE. It doesn’t make me superficial, ungrateful or greedy.

So this morning, I finally gave myself permission to want nice things and permission to go on ahead be wealthy and that I don’t have to be modest about any of it. I gave myself permission to believe that I deserve butt loads of money and to expect it to come to me. And me deserving those things doesn’t mean that I won’t or can’t appreciate where I’m at and what I have right now. But it’s OK in the midst of my absolute appreciation to WANT MORE. It doesn’t make me superficial, ungrateful or greedy. I can want and obtain a 2 million dollar brownstone in Brooklyn (paid in cash not earned from being a drug lord or shady corporate pig) and still be a good person who is thankful and generous. I can share it and how thankful that I am for all of it. And now I can follow (and let’s be honest, re-follow some of) those I formerly perceived as “showy” wealthy people and let them be a source that excites and inspires me because I’m going to be wealthy too.

So many of us want the wealth but there’s a lot of underlying judgement and sometimes guilt or shame in wanting it in the first place because most of us are taught not to be “greedy” and that we are to “just be happy with what we have”. Modesty is glorified; you’re allowed to want more just not too much because then you’re delusional for dreaming too big or you had to have sold your soul for it. But I just had the epiphany that you’re allowed to want more and you’re allowed to show it and share it however you like! It’s your life and your terms. Get that wealth (if that’s what you want) and live it in a way that serves YOU.